I visited a shopping centre last week (having avoided them like the plague for Christmas shopping, I found I urgently needed something for work). As I walked from the car, having done several laps of Australia  searching for a place to park and witnessing  the red-faced exchanges of those fighting over ‘their’ parking spot, I entered the surreal world of a shopping centre  at Christmas.

‘Joy to the World’ was being tinnily piped through the airwaves. I looked around and the only joy I could see was Joy from the western suburbs who had managed to talk the besieged salesperson into selling her a 50 inch plasma for almost half price so that he could at least boost his Christmas sales quota, given the drop in retail this year.

Perhaps it’s me but Christmas seems to have become an ugly, desperate affair for many these days. I hear more people complaining about it than spreading peace and goodwill and it begs the question ‘Why do we do it?’

There is an expanding number of people who question or reject or completely ignore the original Christian message of this holiday. There are many who ‘celebrate’ Christmas out of some misguided sense of ‘duty’, who would rather give the whole thing a miss. Well why don’t you (give it a miss?). Why are you doing it if you hate it? Why do anything you hate doing?

There’s the stress, the cost, the family tensions coming to a head, the sheer anxiety of getting it all done and hoping like hell it’s actually enjoyable.

Then there’s the waste; the planet groaning under the sheer weight of packaging and paper, food scraps and empty bottles and then, in an instant, it’s all over.

Those who suffer with anxiety can feel pushed to the edge. Those with depression may struggle with painful feelings of being ‘left out’.

So let’s keep it in perspective, people. It’s just a day. It’s just one day. If it has any spiritual significance for you, keep that in focus and forget the rest. Let’s get real about what’s important here. Peace and goodwill, being with those you love or, as the song goes, ‘If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with’

If you’re alone, think about volunteering or seek out an ‘Orphan’s Christmas Lunch’ (there are plenty of  healthy, friendly,together people who find themselves alone for Christmas, for a multitude of reasons!)

And, if you are not alone but the family dynamics are really all too much, ask yourself why you are subjecting yourself to this. You don’t have to do it, you know. But if the fear of potential fallout overrides this, then make a deal with yourself. If you have agreed to go ahead with Christmas as usual, you have the chance to do it in an entirely different way.

How?

• Acknowledge that you have  made a free choice to ‘do Christmas’ and stop resenting it.
• Look for the best in those you are sharing it with and ignore their shortcomings
• Be grateful for all that you have (you have shelter and food for a start!)
• Be the bright light that lifts everyone, instead of being pulled down by the grumps
• Remember that in twenty-four hours, the whole thing will be over
• Book an overseas trip for next year to a non-Christian country. There are plenty of bargains over the Christmas period!
• Better still, convert to Buddhism
• Try to see the funny side of the madness

So, for what it’s worth – Merry Christmas everyone and remember, it can only mean what you decide it means. Start with it meaning a nice day off work and take it from there. Oh and make sure to find a way to enjoy it!

All the very best, Bev